Knowing the Puritans, they were OFFICIALLY giving thanks for being delivered from the Popish Beast of Anglican England.
Unofficially, of course, they most likely sending up a big Holla Back to God for putting something on the table that wasn't seaweed or treebark.
Miles Standish: Oh lord, we give thee praise for delivering us from the foul bondage of the Anti-Christ. We honor thee, oh Lord, for thy...
Captain John Smith: What's that huge thing in the center of the table?
Pocahontas: Our people call that a "turkey" oh Rather Cute Man From Across The Sea.
Miles Standish: We shoud be focusing on our deliverance from the horrors of Charles's Papist ways...
Smith: Smells good. What's that red goo next to it?
Pocahontas: Another dish of my people, oh Beefcake Of A Different Tribe. We call it "cranberry garnish."
Smith: Smells wonderful.
Standish (loudly): THE SMELL IS UNIMPORTANT NEXT TO THE BREATH OF FRESH AIR OF LIVING AWAY FROM THE SEDUCTIONS OF THE WHORE OF BABYLON!
Pocahontas: And that round object oh Pale But Pretty Boytoy is a pumpkin pie. For later. I hope you're not going to invite Standish to our wedding. Guy's got real territorial issues going on. Plus, Daddy hates Lutheran heretics....
Smith: Don't worry--I'll tell him that there are Catholics in the next state. He's so easily distracted ...
Anthony
Stumble it!
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