beancounters

All Things HP6

Geeking out ...

"You'd mouth-breathe too, if you had a nose like mine ..."

It's 111 days or so until Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince. What shall we do in the meantime? Hmm ...

Well, we could start by watching the movie trailer in HD about a dozen times, and then watch it frame by frame just to read what's written on all the little Pensieve bottles. And then we could explore all things HP6-related. And then, we could leave each other messages here in the comments section. With me so far?

Maya's Birthday and the Sandwich of Doom

Went out last night to a dinner party, celebrating Maya's birthday in impromptu style. I had a great time, though I only knew a few people, and those were seated far away. I sat surrounded by other people's coworkers, which can sometimes be the most entertaining place at the table.

We talked about blogs. A couple of folks like to use Blogger as their own private journals, not to be shared with the public. They convinced me this is actually a great idea, as there's no paper journal to have to carry around, one can update from any computer, there's a search function, and it's safe from prying eyes. Have you done this before?

I'm not sure exactly what I ate for dinner. I vaguely remember taking a chance on a vegetarian sandwich that was called The Deli-Lama. But that was before this arrived. Pear cider, my dear blogfolk, is now my new vice. Absolutely delicious. It was too dark to read the name on the label, so I've pledged to dedicate my life to finding it again, no matter how many years it takes. (Actually, I anticipate it will just take a call to the restaurant, so I'm not out any actual number of years here. Win!)

By the time my sammich arrived, it was so dark out I couldn't see what I was eating. I'm guessing it was some sort of roasted eggplant and onion affair, but who knows. It could have been marinated sea kelp and fair-trade Brazillian orchids. Oh well, it was very good, and I'm still alive. :-)

New writers' critique group member

New writers' critique group member
Originally uploaded by Inkygirl

Alternative employment

If the economy ever really fails, and/or if Arnold gets his way, I think I could make a living as a pet psychic.

After all, there will still be rich people in the area. They will be in need of somebody to help them spend their money. And the pets I've known have usually been willing to perk up a bit for a 15% cut.

Friday dog-blogging: Dino DNA

Top 10 scientifically inaccurate movies. Um, I don't want to start an argument here, but we at the Beancounter house own or have seen most of these movies. And it's our considered scientific opinion that Jurassic Park could happen. We're sure we're right, because we memorized that bit with the theme park ride and the explanation for Dino DNA, and it makes perfect sense to us.

Did I ever make you read this? Chaotician Ian Malcolm argues Intelligent Design theory with an angel. I did? Dude, I have got to write some new material.

Leeloo's Divine Language from The Fifth Element. Another so-called scientifically improbable movie, I suppose. I'm not clear where the writer obtained this glossary. But that's the way this blog goes. I report; you decide to ignore.

Baen library of free e-books

Star Wars art on Worth 1000

Martha Stewart blogs about the DMV. Martha isn't scientifically improbable ... or is she? How can one woman maintain three households, yet always know right where she stashed a little tin of imported Dutch cocoa? But I digress. Anyway, after reading this, I felt a renewed interest in writing, as she guaranteed I could never be the most boring blogger on the web.

The budget blockbuster

Pass the popcorn! It's time for the latest installment of that popular summer blockbuster, "The Budget Stalemate".

SACRAMENTO (AP) — Gov. Arnold Schwarzenegger is threatening to pay thousands of state employees the federal minimum wage of $6.55 an hour until lawmakers reach a deal on California's overdue state budget.

Ooh! A plot twist. Did not see that coming.

How will our muscular protagonist get himself out of the sticky bureaucratic situation he just placed himself? I mean, what with there being bargaining unit contracts that prohibit tampering with the pay ... and the legal precedent set in 1993 or so when civil servants sued the State for withholding pay (and giving state workers IOUs) ...

California definitely has the funds to pay its hospital workers, its teachers, and its police force - even your fair Beancounter and her fair husband. So this is nothing but a heavy-handed, theatrical ploy. Arnold is famous for them - occasionally, he likes to send a message to the Legislature that he can always go over their heads and down to the people's.

Here's just a part of what would happen if Arnold's threat were ever carried out.

- First, the State Controller's Office, a mild-mannered bunch who issue all the paychecks, would go quietly mad, resetting the system to pay 200,000 employees just $6.55 an hour. Including themselves.

- Then, various factions with large political clout, such as the prison guard union, would demand exceptions to the minimum-wage rule. The machinations would be lengthy and furious.

- My union, CSEA, would rally outside the Capitol every day. The lawns would be awash in purple (the color of our t-shirts).

- In a month or three, the foreclosures would start. I mean, just because we civil servants are paid $200k apiece and live in mansions, does not mean we collectively keep rainy day funds in the bank.

In other words, forget what's morally right or morally wrong - a change to the state worker's rate of pay would cost the State a small fortune to implement, and another, all-new fortune to reverse.

Does Arnold want this kind of trouble? No. It's illogical to believe he would ever let it get that far. This is just one more explosive car chase with which to thrill the budget-watching audience.

Where the hell is Pam?

I have not been updating this week, so I thought I'd explain the reason through the use of interpretive dance.

Tweet tweet

More Twitter-related comics may be cried over at Geek and Poke. [Thanks @bhaven!]

Friday dog-blogging: how I roll

Dr. Horrible's singalong blog - highly recommend by Maya. Plus, Neil Patrick Harris is a total dish.

Michael Bay's rejected 'Dark Knight' script - via Anthony, who says if he and I could ever work up a script like this, and get it produced by the same sorts of people who have kept MB rolling in the benjamins, our success would be assured.

The Pisa money shot - about the tourists who flock to the Leaning Tower of Pisa just to get a picture of themselves holding up the building. It seems there's even a roped-off area just for the occasion! The tourists look so strange when looked at out of context. I was a tourist just last week, so I know strange-looking when I see it.

My five favorite fictional foods - I flagged this because I was shocked at myself - it has honestly never occurred to me to wonder what these foods tasted like. What about you?

And for my mom the English prof: That's how I roll.

Golden Gate-apalooza

Golden Gate
Originally uploaded by beancounter

California Adventure is a more recent addition to Disney. It's dedicated to two things: the California of misty legend, and the more recent Disney movies and TV show tie-ins.

We visited CA Adventure on our 3rd day, so we were beginning to show signs of ride-fatigue. Otherwise some of us would have checked out the roller coaster and the Ferris wheel. As it is, we were content to walk/ride around and experience a meta-view of the state. We traveled through a movie set, saluted the military/industrial complex, then hit a redwood forest, took a left at the San Francisco Victorians, and ate lunch in a cantina, serenaded by a high school mariachi band.

Between the two parks is a huge expanse of concrete acreage that looks like a no-man's land. To keep people's attention - or maybe to keep them from congregating there for very long - Disney blasts heroic theme music at something like 120 db. So as you're leaving CA Adventure and walking (briskly! briskly!) toward the Disneyland entrance, you feel like Indiana Jones making a daring escape.

It wouldn't surprise me if, ultimately, CA Adventure is formally folded into Disneyland proper, instead of being billed as a separate park. It's great-looking, but not enough of an attraction to stand on its own.

Our second home

Our second home
Originally uploaded by beancounter

We've been back since Monday night, but had to jump right back into the work routine. This morning I am finally uploading some photos from our trip and will share 'em 'round very soon.

I would, however, like to show you a photo of what became our second home at Disneyland - Haunted Mansion. We went on this ride maybe a half a dozen times in the 2 1/2 days we were there. I kept steering BB and Bunny toward it as we walked through New Orleans Square on the way to Frontierland. Or else I would bargain my way in - "I will go with you on Splash Mountain again if you'll swing through Haunted Mansion with me after."

I'm happy to report that Haunted Mansion has undergone almost no changes in the years. It's still as animatronically cheesy as I remember it! Unlike 'Pirates of the Caribbean', which has been almost completely cannibalized and revamped to match the movies. Thank goodness Disney's movie of 'Haunted Mansion' was such a bomb. Otherwise there might have been dreadful animatronic Eddie Murphys staring at me throughout my favorite ride.

Friday dog-blogging: exorcism

DIY exorcism (written by me, which means it's meant to be teh funniez, but may not get there, so don't get over-excited)

Aviation news of the weird - The Transportation Security Administration has a whimsical side? Be afraid.

Thsrs - an online thesaurus that delivers short words to match your longer ones. It's a nice break from the thesaurus that comes with Word.

For Anthony: Spoiler alert

And for my nephew: Ball Game. All you have to do is click on the ball, and it will change color. Doesn't that sound easy? Get your dad to help! And Grandma, too!

We'll be back on Tuesday with fresh sunburns, mouse ears, and 10,000 digital photos of me puking on Star Tours. Yep: it's Disneyland or bust!

Word cloud generator of Pern

Develop a cool-looking word cloud out of your blog page or any other text at Wordle. [via Nag] I let Wordle create a word cloud out of the tags on my del.icio.us account, and this is what it came up with. I warn you: it's fairly shocking.

Because Mr. Tibble Whiskers told them to

Pet owners prefer McCain to Obama

WASHINGTON (AP) — If the presidential election goes to the dogs, John McCain is looking like best in show.

An AP-Yahoo! News poll found that pet owners favor McCain over Obama 42 percent to 37 percent, with dog owners particularly in McCain's corner.

"I think a person who owns a pet is a more compassionate person — caring, giving, trustworthy. I like pet owners," said Janet Taylor of Plymouth, Mass.

Taylor, who described herself as a retired stay-at-home wife, owns two cats, Lady Jane Taylor and Mr. Tommy Katz.

Pop Quiz (25 pts.)

When I read that pet owners favor McCain over Obama, my first reaction was:

a) Hmm. Newspaper reporters being laid off everywhere, yet somebody at the AP got paid to write this POS fluff piece. How nice.

b) Frankly, I've heard of worse reasons to favor a presidential candidate. This beats the old "which candidate would you rather barf with in the alley behind a bar" saw.

c) Mr. Tibble Whiskers always chooses who I vote for.

d) Omigod! That is so freaky! I used to own this dog, Gizmo, right? And he loved everybody! He was such a li'l lover! Omigod! But when he met that Dave, that checker from 7-11? Gizmo just growled and tried to bite him and wouldn't let him near me. So, long story short, that's why I drive my grandma's Nissan! .. What was the question again?

Blocks o' fun

How was your Fourth of July? We hosted a block party on Friday night. Weren't sure how many to expect. When we informed our neighbors a few weeks ahead, they'd make noises of interest but mentally pencil us in as Plan B for their holiday weekend. Plan A would invariably involve somebody's brother in-law's kegger up in Rio Linda, complete with firearms, alcohol, and bottle rockets. There was no way we could compete with such excess of riches, so we would just smile and leave the invitation open.

Some who were invited did not turn up; others who were not exactly block neighbors turned up at the last minute. It all came together somehow. Party alchemy.

Early on, I realized our neighbor the shut-in hadn't yet come over. Now, you'd think knowing she's a shut-in, there'd be no question to ponder. But I walked over anyway to remind her she was welcome. It turned out she hadn't been sure we'd really meant to invite her! She made an appearance, fruit salad in hand (called ambrosia [?]), and was soon commisserating about the real estate market along with the best of 'em. We shall upgrade her status to mostly shut-in.

Only a few people stayed for home fireworks. Small controversy: Neighbor Bill has a new wife who is big into out-of-state fireworks. She had roman candles and such from their recent trip to South Dakota. I didn't mind - I'd never seen such things in action - but N. Bob and  my husband were extremely nervous. They kept muttering things like "$750 fine." No matter that we've never seen a patrol car on our block in all the years we've celebrated on this street.

It didn't help neighborly relations when a flying missle bounced off of N. Bob's truck. He proceded to douse his driveway (!) with enough water to fill a swimming pool. I guess this is a subject they'll have to handle diplomatically if we're all going to stay friends.

Huge firecracker: I haz it

pa11
Originally uploaded by popcornjohn

Happy American Independence Day, blogfolk!

Friday dog-blogging: No one would suspect a thing

(YouTube) Elmo's unsuccessful audition for the movie 'Casino' [NSFW due to language, as you will recall]

(YouTube) Light makes all the difference ~ a clever ad that doesn't make sense until the very end.

Billions of bottles of water. This puts it into perspective.

Faggot fanatics. I completely understand what they're talking about. Still, the banners? The last name? The pained look on the teen boy's face? If this isn't an elaborate joke, then it's true that "England and America are two countries separated by a common language".

When Daddy Loves Mommy

And for Anthony: LaCroix does Beetlejuice

No comment, dude

Found here. (Daisy, who lives in England, tells me this is basically how the UK sees America, too.)

Misunderstood

What if the Frankenstein monster was not a monster after all? What if he was just a grouchy 45 year-old whose calf muscles always froze up in his sleep, forcing him to walk off-balance and stiff-legged from one end of the laboratory to the other in order to switch on the coffeemaker?

No, I'm not speaking from experience. Just wondering.

For the birds

This is a heart-warming ad for the Washington Lottery - especially if you're a penguin. [via Tonya]